Tuesday, January 6, 2015

I'm back...again....

Yes, I know, huge surprise.  I haven't written in a long time.  I am still alive!  The kids have not managed to tie me up in the basement somewhere.  Here is my topic today.

Potty Training: Necessary? or a Conspiracy?

I am currently potty training my last minion. Madeline is a spirited 2 1/2 year old.  She is ready, according to all the parenting advice I have read.  She shows all the signs of being old enough to potty train.  So here was our day yesterday:

We wrapped up a package of little girl undies to give her and made a big production of changing her into them.  Then we told her not to get her pretty undies dirty with yucky potty.  We touted the big girl she has become and proceeded to ask her if she needed to go potty every 10 minutes for the rest of our lives....or so it seemed.

10 AM:

We are now proceeding to sit on the potty every 10 minutes, she hasn't had an accident, a promising development, but she has yet to leak a drop in the potty.

11 AM:

Now I'm starting to panic.  Not an accident, not a drop!  And I've pumped a TON of juice into this baby!  She just sits there smirking at me.  I'm beginning to believe that maybe she knows how to use the potty and is just trying to torture me....


Nap time!  I put her in a diaper for her nap.  She promptly lets it all go.....now I know it's a conspiracy.


Wakes up from her nap. We try again with the underwear.  But now she knows how to pull it on and off.  Now we have a problem.  Again, I offer her as much milk and juice as her heart desires.


Still nothing...


Still nothing...not a drop


I sneak downstairs to change over the laundry.....Screaming Shawn alerts me to progress.  I charge up the stairs to find a puddle in the middle of the kitchen table and a relieved looking baby.....

5:30:  I give in and put a diaper on her....admitting defeat for another day....

5:45:  She runs up to tell me she's stinky and takes off running down the hall.  When I finally grab her I realize it's all down her legs and consequently all over my shirt.

6:00 PM.....I'm holed up in the bathroom changing.  Totally convinced I'm going to find some kind of baby communication device in her crib so she can communicate with the mother ship on how her human mother torture experiment is going....


Though Potty Training may be a necessary evil....or a conspiracy, the jury's still out...I have come to the realization that my 2 year old is smarter than I am. So to all the mom's out there....

Good Night, and Good Luck.

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